Idling

I read this in the Idler and felt the need to share it with you all:

Just turn up to work. Hang about for an hour (but this will be the best hour you've ever had at work, spend it relishing the moment) and then go and tell your supervisor/boss that you've just shit yourself.
Wait for a minute for it to sink in and say, "you understand that I'm telling you this in the strictest confidence."
Now he knows it's serious, say, "obviously, I'll have to go home now," and walk out the door (affect a limp at your discretion).
If your supervisor/boss tells anyone, you're in for a treat - make a formal complaint and await your apology/cheque.